Breaking: Marjorie Taylor Greene Is Actually Chuck Norris

By Paul Thomas Zenki

But that’s OK —  it’s all part of the plan …

There’s lots of folks saying US Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene from Georgia is crazy. After all, she claims to believe that 9/11 and Sandy Hook were faked, Trump won the 2020 election, and the Rothschilds used earth-orbiting lasers to spark the California wildfires.

What these people don’t understand is, it’s all a smokescreen to distract attention so that no one notices “she” is actually Chuck Norris. In the role of a lifetime.

Just take a gander at those photos up there. Look at the nose, the eyes. Beneath the wig, the colored contacts, and the makeup —  Hollywood-quality though it may be —  the real and unmistakable Chuck shines through.

Now I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “No Paul Thomas, Marjorie Taylor Greene can’t be Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris is still out there being Chuck Norris.” And that is where you would be wrong.

While Chuck Norris is being Marjorie Taylor Greene, this guy…

Chuck Norris lookalike and Trump supporter Matthew Bledsoe at the US Capitol, 6 January 2021
Photo by Matthew Bledsoe

… is being Chuck Norris. And if his presence at the Capitol Freedom Fight while Chuck was simultaneously in Texas had not been exposed by the Deep State “investigation”, the Truth might never have come to light.

Everybody knows, all great actors have doubles. Comes with the territory. So Chuck and his team were more than ready to roll into action when called to serve. The mission? We’ll get to that in a moment because I know what you’re thinking now: “Paul Thomas, if that dude is being Chuck while Chuck is being Marjorie, who’s being that dude?”

And that is the most brilliant part of the plan. While Marjorie is being played by Chuck and Chuck is being played by his double, his double is being played by… the real Marjorie Taylor Greene.

So while Chuck was playing Marjorie inside the Capitol and Chuck’s double was playing Chuck at the Freedom Fight, Marjorie was in Texas playing the double playing Chuck.

Now at this point you may be wondering, why go to all the hassle? Why not just elect Chuck to the House and save the trouble.

Look, it’s simple. You can’t let Antifa and the Commiecrats know that Chuck is on their tail. That would be stupid. After all, this is Chuck Effin Norris we’re talking about here. The man who can dribble a bowling ball, pop a wheelie on a unicycle, and tie his shoes with his feet — at the same time. You don’t just tell the enemy Chuck is after them. You lose the element of surprise.

So everybody, please. Get off “Marjorie’s” case. Let the plan work. And remember, next time you hear about Marjorie Taylor Greene saying something “crazy”, just keep in mind, it’s crazy like a fox!

Photo of Marjorie Taylor Greene by US Congress; photo of Chuck Norris by US Air Force; public domain

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Paul Thomas Zenki is an essayist, ghostwriter, copywriter, marketer, songwriter, and consultant living in Athens, GA.